‘SAFE’ SEX: THE WONDERFUL CONDOM
People can have sexual contact and not exchange these fluids. Not all sexual contact necessarily involves intercourse. However, genital contact being what it is, and the tendency for sexual stimulation to lead to a situation likely to transmit fluid (like intercourse or ejaculation), a safer way of having sexual contact is while using a condom. When used properly, the condom can reduce (but not totally eliminate) the risk of transmission of diseases which are spread sexually (to say nothing of the added bonus of stopping sperm!).
Condoms need to be used properly in order to be maximally effective. That means putting the condom on at the beginning of foreplay, because the secretions which come out of the penis before ejaculation (orgasm or ‘coming’) can still be infective. Putting on the condom does not need to be an interruption to foreplay; in the right hands, so to speak, it can be quite fun.
The condom is a neat little thing, a thin, strong latex sheath all rolled up ready to be put onto an erect (hard) penis. In the tip of the condom is a little nipple-like pouch, which is there to catch the semen when a man ejaculates. It is important to squeeze the air our of this pouch before the condom is rolled onto the penis, or the air trapped inside can heat up, expand, and the condom can burst, and that is no fun at all.
The condom is put on the tip of the penis, and carefully rolled all the way down to the base, so the entire penis is covered. It is important to avoid tearing the condom with your fingernails as it is rolled onto the penis.
Although condoms are usually already lubricated, additional lubricant (water-based, like K-Y Jelly, not oil-based like Vaseline or baby oil) is a very good idea. It helps to prevent friction, which can weaken the condom (particularly during anal intercourse). It makes it more comfortable for both participants, as well as safer. Some people use a spermicidal jelly as a lubricant, and as extra protection against becoming pregnant. (Oil-based lubricants weaken the latex, and are more likely to make the condom ineffective.)
When a man has an orgasm and ejaculates, the penis, which has been hard and erect, becomes floppy again fairly quickly. If the condom is not removed promptly and carefully, there is a chance there will be some spillage of semen, and that is not desirable. So the penis should be removed from wherever it has been, while the condom is held on so that nothing spills, and the condom does not slip off. The condom should be removed from the penis, any fluid wiped off the penis, and the condom disposed of in the bin (not down the toilet—it is not very good for the plumbing or the environment). A new condom must be used each time you have sexual contact, as they are definitely single-use items.
If you find condoms break, even with lubricants, buying a thicker condom may be a good idea. There are several different types on the market.
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